I haven't been properly out for ages. By "properly out" I mean, going out to somewhere that actually allows me to wear something other than trainers, jeans and a hoodie, which has been my regulation university attire for the past few weeks. The last time I went "properly out" was the night I lost my glasses (still missing in action).

Christ knows what I'll lose tonight. Hopefully it'll be something that I can be easily replaced, like my self-respect, which usually disappears after the first couple of vodkas only to miracously return the next day when I discover I can't remember anything about the night before so I have no reason to feel ashamed about my antics.  

Its just me and Essex out tonight. The rest of my housemates have fucked off home for the weekend, which I can't understand at all when you've got a star of Joe Scully's brightness coming to town. Wideload's still here but no-ones really talking to her at the moment, because she's on one of her "I'm not going to wash for the next week and a half and marinate my generous body proportions in their own filth!" and talking to her when she's in this state is likely to make you start vomiting. Quite violently.

Last time Essex and I were left alone to our own devices was in the first year in halls. I can't really remember what happened other than that we went on a bar crawl on the Friday night and had such a marvellous time we decided to recreate it on the Saturday night and the Sunday night too, resulting in me throwing up on an hourly basis for the whole of Monday. On Tuesday we had to face Barbara the cleaner who used to errr clean our halls, because she was demanding to know who had bought the sign for a local nursing home back to our Halls and left it in our bath. Neither I or Essex could remember doing so it definitely wasn't either of us. Awww good times!  

Right, I better hot foot it off to my lecture and then get on with the important business of choosing an outfit for tonight, which bottle of wine to drink before we go and which album of party tunes to play before we go. Kylie or Girls Aloud. What a daft question, its gotta be Kylie its all about the Australian's tonight!

Its gonna be bonza mate!